The Burial Office

Grief is a natural feeling for us to have when we lose a beloved family member or friend. The Book of Common Prayer reminds us that “the very love we have for each other in Christ brings deep sorrow when we are parted by death. Jesus himself wept at the grave of his friend. So, while we rejoice that one we love has entered into the nearer presence of our Lord, we sorrow in sympathy with those who mourn.” (BCP, p. 507)

When a person is near death, the Minister of the Congregation should be notified, in order that the ministrations of the Church may be provided.

If at all possible, the priest should be notified prior to death in order that the ministrations of the church, including a final confession and an anointing with holy oil, may be provided. It also allows the priest to attend to the pastoral needs of the family in advance of death.

The Book of Common Prayer further advises, “The death of a member of the Church should be reported as soon as possible to, and arrangements for the funeral should be made in consultation with, the Minister of the Congregation.” (BCP, p. 490)

If the above is not possible, the priest should be notified as soon as possible to tend to the pastoral needs of the family and to make arrangements for the funeral.

Either choice is suitable in the eyes of the church. The decision of burial or cremation is one, among others, that is wisely made in consultation with those who will survive you. It is appropriate that that the ashes of a cremated person should be interred or deposited in consecrated ground such as a niche in the Memorial Garden here at Epiphany.

It is customary that a funeral service be scheduled between 3 and 7 days after death. There are a few different options to consider when planning a funeral liturgy for a loved one (or for yourself if you are doing pre-planning):

The Vigil Service - Also known as a wake or a visitation, the vigil service is held in the church, funeral home, or home the evening before a funeral service. In our tradition (though not in popular culture), sitting vigil is most properly done in the church rather than the funeral home. It can also be done in someone’s home. The church’s practice is that the vigil is not a time of socializing but a time to lift the deceased up in prayer. Therefore, it is usually a good idea to have a room set aside for socializing and visiting with the family.

The Burial Office - The burial office is our liturgy for a funeral service, and it is most appropriately done in the church for baptized members of the parish. If, for pastoral reasons, it is better to have the funeral in a funeral home, the clergy will work with you and the funeral home to plan the liturgy appropriately. The burial office is the liturgy used for a funeral or a memorial service with the difference being whether or not a body (or cremains) is present.

The Committal - The Committal is a short liturgy that immediately follows the burial office. We use this liturgy at the graveside when we are placing our beloveds in their final resting place.

Music is an important part of how we pray. Often, the words of hymns, anthems, and canticles help us to express our prayers that are otherwise difficult for us. During the funeral itself, Church of the Epiphany only allows sacred music. Other music can be played during the reception.

Holy Communion is the principal act of worship in The Episcopal Church and therefore is most appropriate for a funeral service for all baptized Christians. A decision about whether or not to include Holy Communion is made in consultation with the priest when planning the service.

In keeping with Christian tradition and practice, we recommend that a funeral be scheduled 3 to 7 days after death. Though the practice originated out of purely practical concerns, it is a good practice to continue as it helps us to find closure and to grieve. It also helps us to be reminded of the wonder of God’s grace and of the hope of the resurrection. Families are encouraged to consider weekdays for the ease of scheduling musicians. Saturday morning is an option for those times when immediate family members are coming from out of state. Funerals cannot be scheduled on Sundays.

Fees for clergy and facilities may be made by check payable to Church of the Epiphany-Tempe and given to the clergy person officiating the funeral. Fees for musicians, caterers, or other outside vendors should be made directly to those persons. Fees may not be paid in advance and are subject to change.

Active Members*:

-Clergy - Discretionary

-Music - $150

-Flowers - $150

-Altar Guild - $50

-Reception** - $150

All Others:

-Clergy - $250

-Music - $250

-Flowers - $200

-Altar Guild - $150

-Reception** - $450

*Active Members are those who have been faithful in working, praying, and giving for the spread of the Kingdom of God at Church of the Epiphany for at least one year

**Includes the use of the parish hall, tables, chairs, and table linens

Memorial gifts can be made for whatever purpose the deceased desired or at the desire of the family. A notation about where people can make a memorial gift can be included in the bulletin if provided to the church in advance. It is suggested that memorial gifts go towards Epiphany's memorial fund or to a charity.

In lieu of sending flowers, families are encouraged to inform friends to make a memorial gift. The only flowers that will be brought into the nave are those appointed for the adornment of the altar. All others will be placed in the narthex or in the parish hall for the reception.

It is most appropriate for family to help with reading the readings from the Old Testament and the Epistle. It is also appropriate for family members to bring forward the bread and wine for Holy Eucharist if that is being included in the service.

Eulogies or testimonies about the deceased are not appropriate within the context of the burial office. Instead, arrangements can be made for those to be done prior to the start of the funeral service or after the funeral service during the reception. The homily is delivered by the celebrant and focuses on the hope we find in the resurrection of Christ.

Fraternal or other organizational rites are not added to or mingled with the liturgy of the church. If such a service is desired, it should happen before the liturgy of the church. The vigil (or wake), if held in a funeral home or private home, is an appropriate setting for these services.